A Report from the Blueberry Patch

Story and Photos by Charles Chandler

In late July we head out of Fremont on South Warner Ave. to our favorite U-Pick blueberry patch. The purpose of this little jaunt is complicated. One is to replenish our stock of berries as they are additions to summer salads, blueberry pancakes and that winter essential, warm McCann’s Irish Oatmeal. Another is to stroll down memory lane recalling the summer tortures of having to pick whatever was ready in our grandfather’s truck farm. 

The most soul satisfying part of this outing is to just for a moment enjoy the company of my fellow humans. It is my opinion that we are at our absolute best when we are picking blueberries. I don’t know what it is about berry picking but it certainly soothes the beasts. I have never heard a single curse word, angry exchange or a raised voice from a parent or picker. I’ve often thought Congress or the Supreme Court should hold their sessions in blueberry patches.

Another joy of U-Pick patches is that they always appear to be family friendly. On my last outing, while walking back to the weigh- up shed, I passed a bevy of small girls in lovely long dresses and crisp bonnets. They had small buckets, a water jug and were there to work, moving quickly and quietly with purpose in their steps. This brought on a small ripple of nostalgia because the women in my family all wore sun bonnets and long sleeves when working on the family farm. In our favorite patch there are always several young families with numerous children of all ages, and a couple of resolute seniors picking among the rows. From what I hear the main purpose of these seniors is to overpraise the contribution to the family pails by these young pickers.

Our Newaygo County favorite is a mature farm with tall robust bushes. You normally can’t see your fellow pickers unless you are side by side, but you can hear them. The tall thick bushes give you a sense of privacy but trust me, I’ve overheard some amazing conversations plus frequent humming, whistling, and singing. The females appear to be the most vocal of our berry picking species. They seem quite content chatting with other females, while holding day school for beginner pickers tumbling around their legs. From the conservations, these newbies seem to eat more berries than they put in the family bucket. These wee folks are so charming because in the patch, they get to use their “outside” voice. Do they ever turn the volume up and throw away the knob? You can hear adorable giggles and some humorous stuff from these little guys. The other day I was picking near a young mom and her friend. She had one small guy on the ground, one in a stroller and one in a chest sling, picking and chatting away with her friend dressed like Martha Stewart. On the other side of me was a lovely Hispanic mom with a teenage daughter, picking away and talking softly in Spanish. 

Generally during an outing, you will hear something really funny or totally unexpected. The other day I heard this woman state quite loudly that she had to go. Then a male voice a couple rows over says, “Oh, please don’t go.” Then others joined in and all across the patch you could hear the echo, “Oh, please don’t go.”  A bit later I heard this guy a few rows ahead of me talking to some unseen person. He had this smooth baritone voice with a little country color in his accent. I thought he could be a country and western singer. In a minute he ran into someone else they knew and the new someone proclaimed, “Well, hello there.” The baritone picker, without a pause, launched into a few verses of Willie Nelson’s Funny How Time Slips Away. You remember that one with the famous verse, “Well, hello there. It’s been a long, long time.”  I knew he was a singer. 

My most perfect moment happened a couple of years back. I was out in the patch early. It was still cool; the berry bushes had a little dew on them, and it was quiet with very few pickers around. Around an hour later this woman with a beautiful clear voice began a full-on operatic presentation of what could have been some famous aria. To this day who she was or what she was singing is still a mystery. Maybe an angel? It was a gift for those pickers that heard that beautiful rendition. For me it was a transcendent moment. As I said, picking blueberries brings out the best in humankind. 

If you need to restock your freezer, now is the time. Or, if you are stressed out from managing your out-of-school crew or those visiting relatives, then gather them up and head to the nearest blueberry patch. General admission is about $1.50 a pound for beautiful healthy blueberries and a short, but wonderful, distracting experience.

Cheap, at twice the price.