Megan Again: Quit Everything!
A story of puppy love
By Megan Wirts
I was with friends the other night and they remarked on how I seem to be happier lately, content even.
That may not seem like a big deal to some, but for me it is. The past few years have been a series of lessons in perseverance, change, control, patience, and finding my purpose. I have tried to figure out who I am inside a body that doesn’t like to cooperate with what I want most of the time. For those of you that may have just found me here at N3, I was diagnosed with a neurological movement disorder called Dystonia a few years ago and it changed my life. It has caused me much pain, grief and sorrow. It has also given me time, new experiences and a new perspective.
I have always been driven and a goal oriented person. When I started to show symptoms, my goal was to fix it. When it couldn’t be fixed with not one, but two brain surgeries, weight loss, multiple medications and therapies as well as begging, pleading, praying, bargaining, positive thinking, oils, herbs, potions and magical spells?
It was time to accept that I have this and I need to learn to live with it.
Some of my friends and family stopped messaging me, calling and/or visiting. I was feeling isolated, lonely and depressed. I was desperate for attention and for people to see me. I was desperate to feel like my old self. I dabbled in stand up comedy, baking cheesecakes and trying to do all the things my heart wanted despite them being more than my body could handle. I pushed and pushed until I was so run down and physically hurting that I couldn’t get out of bed. Everything was starting to hurt me more than help me.
Besides, there is only so much terrible open mic comedy that a human can endure and believe me I was over it.
That’s when I quit everything. I stopped pushing and fighting for things and people that were no longer good for my health, mentally and physically. Making that decision put me in a bit of a funk for awhile. I once again had to grieve the idea of what I thought my life should be like. I once again had to find out what makes me feel purposeful.
I am a wife and a mother and that is a wonderful and fulfilling part of my life, but my children are getting older and they don’t really want me all up in their business all the time (even though I am super nosy and I love it when they “spill the tea”) . I need to have a life of my own beyond motherhood and being a spouse. That’s just who I am and having a physical disability isn’t changing that.
Then I decided that I needed a puppy.
That’s where I am friends. I quit everything and I got a puppy.
Is my new purpose in life, to be utterly obsessed and in love with my new furry friend? Probably not.
Will I still try to pursue new dreams and set new goals? Yes, like writing my dream show called “The Megan Wirts Christmas Spectacular” (Maybe in 2020?).
Am I currently happy and feeling content? Absolutely.
This puppy has got me. His name is Rigby and he’s a 4 month old Pembroke Welsh Corgi. He’s adorable and I love him. Now, I am not saying that getting a puppy is the solution to everything. Some people should not have puppies or can’t have one due to where they live, the amount of time they have or allergies, among other things. (If you are in that situation, you can look at cute photos and videos my puppy on Instagram @rigby.thecorgi).
Did I sleep the first week or two that we brought Rigby home? No, but it was worth it. He has melded right into our family. Our 5 year old Poodle Mix, Bosco, loves him and is the best dog brother, our cats are indifferent as cats usually are and the kids adore him. My husband was reluctant about getting a puppy at first, but after some powerpoint presentations, long discussions and reasons that he could not say no to, it was puppy time. He is now almost as obsessed with him as I am. He won’t even deny it now. We are all in love.
I have learned that it’s okay to stop pushing, stop fighting and stop doing things that are not serving you in a positive way any longer. If something is sucking the life out of your soul, quit. If people in your life are thieves of your joy, let them go. Surround yourself with people that love and respect you as much as you do them. The holidays are upon us and I know that many people struggle with family drama and uncomfortable situations. You can say no, if you want to. You can set boundaries that protect your heart, mind and spirit. You are in control of your own happiness.
Puppies help too.
“Happiness is a warm puppy.” - Charles M. Schulz
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