I recently read a quote on Instagram about dreams being big enough to scare you. I’ve been thinking about it ever since.
Training for this marathon has been the scariest step outside my comfort zone I can remember for a really long time. I had a good idea of what I was getting into when I decided to do it...which was why it was so scary. I had so many questions.
Would my body hold up?
Could I make the training schedule work with my already busy schedule?
Would I enjoy it or hate it?
Would quitting cross my mind?
Could I even run more than 15.5 miles (my previous farthest distance) in one go?
Just how nuts am I to want to do this?
The last time I remember feeling trepidation about stepping outside my comfort zone was when Ken asked me to start contributing to Near North Now.
It was at a Newaygo soccer game. I was there taking pictures for yearbook. He came in with his camera and notepad, as you all generally see him. We chatted for a few minutes.
Ken: “You taking pictures?”
Me: “I am!”
Ken: “Want to send those my way and maybe also write something up?”
Me: “I will………(I didn’t say I do WANT to….but how does anyone say no to Ken?)………….”
We started meeting after that once a week. He visited my classroom to mentor some of my yearbook students occasionally. The first few months I remember thinking to myself “do I really want to add this into my already hectic schedule?”
My husband just shook his head at me. Another thing you’re doing?
But as time went on, I started to enjoy the way I was being challenged and mentally stretched. Ken encouraged me to write things that I wasn’t comfortable writing.
Will people really want to read this?
How many errors will I make in my writing?
Why would I open myself up to criticism by the public?
Don’t I have enough to do?
How many times will my pictures be blurry or mediocre or flat out bad?
Those questions started to fade away. I can’t say still to this day I am 100% comfortable putting myself out there in columns like this. It still surprises me when I have people talk to me about my articles and I think how fun it is that people enjoy them.
It’s the stretching and the growing and the changing that have made it all worth it. I am enjoying myself immensely in this venture. It’s still scary. But worth the fear.
Two weeks remain until Marathon Morning. I am in the tapering phase of training now. In checking the schedule, I realized that my slow run this Thursday is only 5 miles. Wait? What? Not 10 or 12? What will I do with all that energy afterwards?
I won’t jinx myself, because sometimes the last two weeks injuries do happen. But I have made it through the hardest of the training. I’m almost there.
I can undoubtedly say that training for this marathon has changed me to my core. I’m a different person than when I started.
Without question, taking the plunge to train for this marathon was the scariest thing I have done in a few years, if not in my adult life. It has been exhausting and completely rejuvenating all at the same time. I am so thankful I stepped off the cliff.
My final Marathon Miles will be in another few weeks once I cross the finish line. My hope is to explain the ways the race, and all the miles of training, have changed me.
Until then, I’ll be tapering. Hydrating. Trying to figure out the seesaw that is mother nature in Michigan right now. Eating. So much eating. And contemplating how thankful I am for having taken the leap into this terrifying journey.